Thoughts from a Tired Brain

My kids are tucked in bed a half hour earlier than usual due to being extra sleepy.  My husband leaves to go to a party for a few hours.  I survey the house.  Messy. Again.  Despite my dear husband’s attempt to clean it up for me while I was gone in the morning.  I brace myself and dive in.  The house cannot stay this way.  Energy rises.  Let’s do this!  Potatoes, carrots, onions chopped.  Ingredients thrown into the crockpot and turned on low.  Done! I survey the kitchen.  Seems so impossible to do.  Brace and dive in again.  Dishes loaded, washed, surfaces wiped down, dishwasher hums pleasantly.  Feels good.  Clear and sweep the floor.  Do I mop in again?  No.  It’ll last till another day.  I turn off the kitchen light.  One room done.

I walk into the dining room and living room.  What a mess.  I begin with the toys.  Should’ve had the kids do it but with how grumpy everyone was…it’s just best this way.  Energy wanes.  Must be all the bending over.  Toys!  Oh so many.  Vacuum?  No, too loud.  The house is nice and quiet.

The floor is cleaner.  It’s done.  Now laundry.  Four loads to fold.  Should I put away the laundry from earlier this week?  Yes.  I need those laundry baskets again.  Thank you Lord that my kids are sound sleepers.  Now to fold.  One load folded.  Quick, hurry, your energy is almost gone.  Three loads done.  Feeling wiped.  Fold the towels?  Nope.  They will keep until another day.  Reload the laundry baskets and push them out of the way.  The clothes will get put away…or worn…whichever comes first.

Energy done.  Ready for bed.  Wait, I have a treat in the freezer that I was waiting to eat until the kids were in bed.  Yes, always energy for a treat that contains chocolate.  I will sit and eat and type.  Then to bed.  It’s late.  Ha, used to be that after 9 was only “getting” late.

One day, I’d like a quiet night in a clean house to just read to my heart’s content.  For now I’m thankful that I will rise to lunch cooked and ready, clean surfaces to dirty again with breakfast, clean laundry to unfold as items are selected out of the laundry basket, and a clean living room floor to scatter toys all over again.

I smile to think of Owen coming down the stairs tomorrow gasping in pleasure and saying “Wow, what happened?”  Yeah, its a shock.  I already hear from my kids when I tell them to clean up, “Who’s coming over?”  No one.  Just us.  Every now and again its nice to exist in a clean house.  It’s sanity producing somehow.

Now off to bed.  I feel content even though there is still so much to do.  I fought against Chaos.  I will fight it again tomorrow and the next day.  It will win some battles and I will win others.  This seems to be life now.  Oh Lord, help me to accept that and be content and relaxed even in the chaos.