Well, I decided to pick up this blog again. For how long this will last, I don’t know. I’m not much of a writer. I’m writing this as I embark on a new journey, an journey that takes me from pretending that I am still single to the realization that I am married. A journey that I hope and sincerely pray will bring me closer to my Savior and will make me a better wife, mother, and homemaker. I’ve realized that I have been trying to be a wife and mother and homemaker while still trying to seek my after my own way and do what I want to do. Needless to say, that doesn’t work! I can’t do what I want to do and be a “good” wife and mother. The two do not mesh! I am ashamed to say that I have been living like this for the past two years now and wondering where I am going wrong!
So, I have resolved a couple of things-first, to realize that when I became a wife, I knowingly or unknowingly took on the responsibilities of cooking and cleaning (both I hate!). This means that even when I don’t “feel” like doing the laundry or dishes, that doesn’t matter. This is my calling, to keep house for my husband. So my resolve is to strive harder to be a better cook and make better meals for both my husband and son and to work harder at this house to make it look as nice as it possibly can (with a near toddler and another infant in a few months!).
Secondly, I have resolved to to put my son’s and husband’s desires before my own. Now this will not be accomplished in a day or two, sadly, but I trust that my Lord,who convicted me in the first place, will work on me with this!! One step toward this was to delete my Farmville off of Facebook (yes, you all may laugh at me for this!!). I have enjoyed playing it but it is getting in the way of things that need to get done and also getting in the way of caring for and playing with my son, so it went. That was kinda hard but I’m sure that any free time I have will be better spent reading or doing something extra special with or for my son and husband! My son would better benefit from me playing with him or reading to him.
Thirdly, but certainly not the last resolve I’m sure, is that I have resolved to enjoy working in the kitchen and making tasty creations that everyone will enjoy. As part of this resolve, I am making chicken and potatoes with cheese for Owen. Poor kid has only been eating single veggies and fruit and its time for some more interesting combos. He is almost a year! I know that this third resolve kinda goes along with the first but for me, this is a really big thing. I think I dislike cooking more than cleaning! I’m curious where this resolve will lead me. Already I’m thinking of freezing and maybe even canning at some point (my mom would pass out if she read this part!). Oh, and Paul, honey, sweety, darling…this may mean we will need a freezer at some point…but this is for your benefit as well!
These resolves sound like an exciting adventure right now but I know that there will be failures and struggles along the way but I hope that in the end, my resolves, by God’s help, will pay out.
Well, its time for me to get off. Owen has gotten up from his nap a little early and is calling for me. I think this falls under resolve number 2 so for now I will get off and pay attention to him. I look forward to seeing where this takes me and would appreciate any prayers or tips that you can give me!